Weekly Round up - 4th November 2020
This post has been edited and reposted here. It was originally posted on the 4th of November 2020
Hello and welcome to the first weekly round-up. So, this week has been a busy one. I started this blog, a YouTube channel, I signed up to twitch to be able to stream the games I enjoy. I have been wanting to experiment with building an online presence for years now. It is only now that I have reached the point where I can say: you know what? I am just going to do it. I am going to put myself out there and see what happens. I don't expect my channels to take off and make me a millionaire, but I also don't lose anything by giving it a good go. I have not lost anything by starting now rather than sooner but I also don't want to leave it to never get around to it. After all, the best time to plant a tree was twenty years ago, the second-best time is now.
I am dubious for good reason about this whole process. I am already working full time and dealing with chronic health conditions. Which, for a long time, was too much for me to handle. Knowing that life as it is can be tough and sometimes can leave me without the energy to do anything except work and rest, I am heading into this with no expectations. By that I mean that I am going to prioritise my health and my wellbeing over building an online empire. I would love to be able to say that I am going to write on my blog at least twice a week and that I am going to upload a weekly round up to YouTube and the blog every Wednesday. I would love to be able to stream every Friday and get that stream on YouTube every Sunday. In theory it doesn't sound like a lot, but in practice it will be. Especially in the beginning, where I am learning how to do all of this from scratch. Admittedly, yes, I have a few people around to help me on my way but for the most part I am shooting in the dark with this.
In a way, the unknown of this whole experiment is what excites me. I have a very overactive imagination and that can be an amazingly useful tool for thinking outside of the box, problem solving, creative writing and the like. However, it can get ahead of me. Part of me wants to be realistic and knows that things take time to come to fruition if they will bear fruit at all. The other part wants to strive for an online presence that supports me financially and that I enjoy creating. However, only time can tell and, for now, I am not getting my hopes up.
Now, I wish I could have had the first of my weekly round ups be solely about my channel and the developments there, but it wouldn't be a complete round up without discussing the upcoming lockdown in the UK. It was announced this week that the United Kingdom is facing increased restrictions for at least four weeks. I am lucky in that despite working in retail my store will remain open. Albeit in diminished capacity. I will be working fewer hours but will be getting some compensation from the government and my employers to stay afloat financially. This does mean, however, that I will be able to devote more time to the blog and YouTube and perhaps I will even be able to get streaming by the end of it. Perhaps this lockdown is a blessing in disguise. I may be able to slog through the steeping part of the learning curve for this sort of this during a period of unprecedented upheaval. Only time will tell!
Now, for the more unpleasant part of this week's round up. A discussion of my health. I am aiming to be honest about my health throughout my time writing on this blog and posting videos to YouTube. Though I will spare you all the gory details. The last week started off strong, I was feeling good. My body was holding together well, and my stomach wasn't doing too badly. I was chugging along just fine until Sunday evening. That evening something changed. Since then, I have been struggling to eat and only managing restless, broken sleep. I have grown used to my stomach hurting and causing problems for me, but this was different. I have been managing my stomach condition taking my medication diligently and adjusting dose based on my pain and other symptoms. This pain, though it was not new as per se, was different. Ever since I have had issues with my stomach, I have experienced issues with what the doctors call IBS. It has gotten worse than ever over the last few days and I have been in touch with my doctors. Fingers crossed in the coming days and weeks they can help me. In a way, I am glad that this is happening now, as lockdown occurs, as I will have more time to rest and recuperate. However, I can't help but feel a little defeated. I have been struggling with chronic health conditions my entire adult life and sometimes it all seems to get to be a bit too much. I keep working to mitigate what I can and to remind myself that I am not defined by my illnesses. I am not the person with hypermobility, stomach problems and IBS. I am a person first. A person who happens to have those conditions. Even though I work hard, and I repeat my mantras. Even though I am redefining my viewpoint, it isn't always enough. In cases like mine, where there isn't a point where I will be better and medically 'normal', it is easy to lose sight of the person you are in the miasma of the conditions. This blog is just one of the ways that I am keeping track of my world at large. To stop myself from focussing down too much on my health. Don't get me wrong, my health is a major priority, but it isn't the only one and I have to remember that.
Thank you for joining me for this weekly roundup. I hope you enjoyed reading it as much as I did writing it. The next one shouldn't have as many negatives (fingers crossed anyways).